Fam Damily

I mentioned back on day 17 of the photo challenge that my biological dad had recently friended me on Facebook.  I let a few weeks go by, and hadn't heard anything from him.  I decided that I would try to reach out to him.  In the spirit of the holidays and all that mumbo jumbo.  :)  So I sent him a quick message on Facebook, basically asking what his intentions were.  It's been nearly 30 years since he last contacted me, why now?  Did he want to get to know me, have some semblance of a relationship with me, or what.  I said that I had a lot of questions, and if I'm being totally honest, a lot of resentment and anger towards him. 

He replied back right away.  Said that he was waiting until after the holidays, as he didn't want to cause me any confusion or make the time with my family difficult.  He said that decisions were made thirty years ago that he didn't like, but he went along with.  He said I was the joy in his life, and he still carries a photo of me with him.  He was married for 25 years, and has begun to re-evaluate things in his life since the divorce.

So, long story short.  Well, shorter.  It comes out that he used to send me letters.  A couple times a year to find out how I was, and asking for photos.  He never got any response, and after awhile he stopped writing.  He didn't know what I was told.  If I knew he existed, or not.  Well, during the divorce, his ex-wife asked him if he ever wrote me any more letters.  He said he hadn't, and she told him that if he did, I might actually get them now.  All those years he wrote to me, she made sure they were never mailed.  Can you believe that?  Granted, he's not entirely innocent in that he could have mailed the letters himself, or talked to my mom directly when his ex-wife told him that he shouldn't send me gifts anymore because it caused too much confusion. 

We're continuing to email each other.  He seems genuine and sincere in what he says.  I'm hopeful, but still somewhat apprehensive.  It's kind of weird... what do you say to your dad that you haven't talked to in 30 years?  Mostly we're just trying to get to know each other right now.  I have 2 half brothers, in addition to the one that contacted me a few years ago.  One is 26 years old, the other is 24.  He told the 24 year old about me just Friday night, and the other one doesn't know yet.  Kind of weird.  Couldn't I have gotten a sister outta the deal?  Instead I now have 6 brothers!  :) 

We'll see how it all works out.  Just taking it one day at a time!